Wrap: Brian Posehn and Dawn Olivieri

Gracing our studio was the excessively tall yet very humorous Brian Posehn from The Sarah Silverman Program, and the excessively long-haired yet very smart Dawn Olivieri, lately of Heroes and soon to appear in True Blood.

Watch this episode and you will learn! www.thestream.tv

We’re suckers for tall and funny guests. So actor/writer/standup comedian/recreational metal-head Brian Posehn – all 6′ 6″ of him – matched our tastes perfectly. Somehow we fit Brian into our camera frame, and managed to interview him about the recent developments in his career. For the most part, this had to do with his constant standup touring as well as his upcoming DVD Fart and Weiner Jokes (Pre-Order HERE!) We also quizzed him about his role in The Sarah Silverman Program, starring a woman who’s at best two-thirds his size. In spite of that, Brian enjoys his role – an easy once, since most of what he’s required to do is sit around and look irate.

Brian threatens to leave the show in the middle of actually "leaving the show" at the end of his interview!* (*might not be actually true.)

Gee, I wonder what Jessie's singing about... specifically. (Gramo likes it!)

No one’s going to challenge a tall man’s taste in movies, but that didn’t stop us from taxing Brian’s knowledge of his favorite genre. We imposed a game on him - “Horror or Porno?” – in which he had to… well, you get the point. Horror-head Brian screeched by with a win despite a few miscues (yes, Satan Lake really is a porno.)

Brian shows everyone how you can smoke harmless tobacco by using a toilet roll and some foil. In case you ever need that skill for... harmless tobacco products.

We wrapped Brian’s segment with a bit inspired by the aching love stanzas of William Shakespeare’s sonnets, “Dirt Bag D.I.Y.” In this special how-to, Brian showed us how to make a pipe out of nothing more than a toilet paper roll and a piece of tin foil. NOTE: this does NOT imply that we condone the usage of illicit substances. Unless, of course, you have some on your person. In that case, please send it at once to our offices, specifically the blog writing department. We’ll even mention your name on air if we can somehow remember it.

Dawn considers an escape hatch, while Brian has still not recovered from this full body smile.

Our host tries to beat Dawn in a chin-holding contest...his giant head weighed him down.

Next up was the lovely Dawn Olivieri. Dawn’s a rising star in the film and TV world, enjoying a recurring role on NBC’s Heroes and currently lensing a part as a member of a werewolf family in the HBO vampire Gothic True Blood. In between these gigs, she manages to hop around the world at least a little bit – she told us a tale or two about her experiences backpacking in Peru. No word on whether this involved full moon howling or raw meat eating, however. With our guests, it was a horror-filled night (and no, we’re not making a sly reference to John Fulton’s frightening sweater).

John is now sponsored by the pattern "Argyle.

So we decided to continue the theme with Dawn, attacking her mercilessly with “Horror Virgins”, a quiz in which she had to identify which actor from a multiple choice pack made their debut in a named horror movie.  Dawn wasn’t too keen on the game, yet she soldiered on, nailing all of the questions she was asked.

Dawn and Stu display gang signs from their days together in the Young-Hairy-Lycanthropes Posse. YHLP for life, yo!

Finally, we took her for a midnight, full moon race along our “59 Second Gauntlet”. Very few have run the full gauntlet and lived to tell the tale (come on, give us a break; we gotta hype it up somehow). Dawn made our Wall of Geniuses for finishing it, squeezing in all 16 of her answers in something like 0:58:99.99525. Now if that doesn’t make her a prize guest, what does?

LIVE! From the future... on ICE! We're second only to "Abba-on-Ice"

Well, kinky and twisted Craigslist postings certainly would. We capped off the episode with a new edition of “Strictly Platonic”, and man, if you think werewolves and artificial blood-drinking vampires are weird, get a load of these folk. One contributor was seeking a “teacher for sexual competence” – apparently of the platonic variety – for which he was well qualified, as he’s “six feet tall. Inexperienced. Hung.” Another headline grabber was Mr. (we think) “Cunnilingus addict won’t quit!”. This gentleman or lady wrote, “Hell, there are worse things to be addicted to!”. Yes … like bad spelling. Despite his obvious passion, this person badly mangled his favorite word by spelling it “Cunningluingus”. We hope his/her technique is at least a little better.

Most of us get tough, a la Billy Idol... but for John, it brought back bad memories of the "Rebel Yell" tour.

None of this blog post is a lie… for the most part. See the evidence when you watch this episode at www.thestream.tv Guess who’s the “BEST LIVE SHOW of 2009”? Indeed – us truly. You can’t have cufflinks without the word “links”. Kinda makes you wonder, doesn’t it? Watch all our shows, Feedburner, Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, YouTube, IMDB, LiveFromTheFuture.com

Wrap: David Fickas and Brice Beckham from The Iceman Chronicles

We talked Icemen, entertainers named Jack and 1980s sitcoms with our new friends David Fickas and Brice Beckham of the web series The Iceman Chronicles and wholesome family short film Buttf#$%er.

Watch this episode or the Iceman will get you. Oooh, kids, that’s scary.  www.thestream.tv

We’ve been doing this live internet TV show thing for a while, so we’re happy when we can bring on guests who are similarly web TV activated. David Fickas and Brice Beckham are longtime collaborators whose web series The Iceman Chronicles is building up a good amount of buzz on the internets.

Jack shows us how real guitarists play - right handed.

Speaking of a good buzz, our mainstay musical director John Fulton was absent this show – apparently his little “business trip” to Tijuana didn’t go quite as smoothly as planned. What’s the Spanish phrase for “Please allow me to visit the ATM to retrieve my bail money”, by the way? Regardless, he was replaced by his bandmate from the Fresh,  Jack Voorhies. Jack got right into the spirit of things by writing and singing a lovely, heartbreaking ditty that perfectly encapsulated many moments on our show, “The Awkward Song”. Were those tears in Jessie’s eyes as she sang harmony on this tune?

Our esteemed producer LV actually laughs at one of Stu's jokes. We captured this rare and special moment on film.

Despite Jack’s newness and decency in helping us do the show, Stu decided to subject him to a trial by fire. In Live! From the Future terms, this means a round of “You Supply the Set-Up”, in which chat roomers and friends sent in joke set-ups for Jack and Stu to complete. We’re not exactly sure who won this game; we were too busy doubled over laughing at Stu’s attempts to finish the gags. Joke set ups courtesy of: Tom K Video, Tom Clark, Chris Strait, Gary Cannon, and Senor Shutter!

Stu pitches a sequel to Buttf%$#er. Stu, it's not meant to be a DOCUMENTARY.

Thankfully, we had David and Brice to rescue us. Our guests took us through their long history together, first as schoolmates at USC and later as co-creators of the VH1 series I Hate My 30s. The pair, who split writing, producing, directing and acting tasks, are admirably active in the web sphere. They’ve created the very funny short video Buttfucker in addition to the currently running The Iceman Chronicles, in which David plays a goofy pathologist/veterinarian trying to figure out a puzzling murder.

David shows everyone his private technique - clearly, Brice is a bit uncomfortable with this.

David plays a smart figuring out type of person on his series, so we somehow thought it’d be appropriate if we gave he and Brice a quiz. This one, in honor of our brave musical fill-in, was entitled “You Don’t Know Jack”, and pitted our guest pair against the esteemed Mr. Voorhies.

Our guests lose their cool and threaten Stu's life - 3rd time this week, Stu.

The three guys compete in an intense staring contest. Brice won; he's still gazing at our wall several days later.

The two teams had to compete to identify a particular Jack from a set of clues; the first team/individual to answer won the round. Muddying these waters greatly was Stu, who was a little vague about the rules for calling out the answers. Hand raised? Name shouted? Answer barked? We never really figured it out (”that’s awkwaaaaard…”). Nevertheless, David and Brice took the victory, nailing the final query (”Cracker Jack”) in microseconds. Or at least we think they won; the well-bribed judges are still counting the tally cards and will have an answer “within a few years, we promise”.

Jack Voorhies, elated as usual. Comedy = tortured souls.

While Jack seethed and thought of vengeful lyrics for an “I Hate Stu” song or double album, we wrapped the show with one of our old standbys, “Strictly Platonic”.  We had several winners in this edition, including a man who was willing to pay “100 Roses” for a nude lap dance (nothing erotic about that, no sir), and a person seeking his “dolphin princess” who naturally must possess “sleek rubbery skin and sonar”. Gosh, that sounds exactly like Jessie! Wow, where would the world of online dating be without us, eh?

Jessie sends one final text before transforming herself into a sea mammal in order to attract more suitable mates.

"What, you taped the WHOLE THING? That wasn't in the release form!"

Watch this episode, it’s funnier than Lost. We even have a Smog Monster! Okay, maybe not. www.thestream.tv

You voted us “BEST LIVE SHOW of 2009!”. In return, we’ll name our first four children after you…  as long as you’re named “Vladislav”.

We got lots of those link thingamajigs.  Watch all our shows, Feedburner, Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, YouTube, IMDB, LiveFromTheFuture.com,

Wrap: Catherine Black and T’Shaun Barrett

Our guests for the evening were actress and Canadian person Catherine Black and actor/comedian/Magic Castle insider T’Shaun Barrett.

Who can resist a nice smile like that? Certainly not us. Watch this show at www.thestream.tv.

For the first time in, oh, several shows, our core commando team of Stu, John and Jessie were in the house and working an episode together. To commemorate this increasingly special occasion, the three sang a commemorative song to open the show and greet the audience – “Hello”, in which they all, uh, sang “hello” both solo and in harmony. We have a sneaking suspicion that whoever wrote the lyrics didn’t spend a lot of time on their work. Following that, a brief recap of our three leads’ respective Valentine’s Days revealed that Stu spent the night alone thinking disturbingly sub-sexual thoughts about John’s hair.  Keep the pomade far away from that man, we beg you.

John, working hard and earning his pay on another set of lyrics... ummm, maybe not.

Fabulous hair was on full display with our first guest, Canadian actress Catherine Black. True to her name and hair color, Catherine has appeared in several movies/TV shows of a dark nature. Her most recent filmic effort, the fact-based The Donner Party, concerns a group of California settlers falling prey to cannibalism in a desperate bid for survival. Since she often appears in grim material, we felt it appropriate to throw the quiz “I Goth It Right” her way. Catherine had to guess which nearby word or name was replaceable by “Goth” (e.g., “Lead singer of Van Halen – David Lee Goth”). Would anyone like a bowl of chicken goth while you read this, by the way? Ha ha. We’re such wordsmiths.

Catherine looking bright and perky, at least before we forced her to take the Goth quiz.

There was nothing Goth-y about our next guest, actor and funny guy T’Shaun Barrett. T’Shaun’s been acting and comedian-ing since his very early teens, when he scored a part in a play being performed at his dad’s church. He’s since made it into film, TV and commercials, perhaps the most known of which is the current McDonald’s spot where he plays a penny-pinching, jack-hammering husband desperate to save money.

T'Shaun challenges Stu to a ninja fight in the parking lot. Good thing Our Host stashed a pair of nunchucks in his crutches.

T’Shaun confessed to us his childhood dream of becoming a ninja, which made him a perfect candidate for our quiz game requiring deadly stealth and nerves of iron, “Power, Fame or Fatty”. T’Shaun had to identify whether a named person was a current Olympic medalist, a president of a country, or a champion competitive eater. He somehow guessed that guy who holds the record for eating the most ears of corn at one sitting, but only broke even on the overall quiz. Obviously, he isn’t ninja material after all.

Stu falls for T'Shaun's old "I just made your paycheck disappear" trick.

It’s good that he has other talents, then. We provided a deck of cards for this aspiring magician (and Magic Castle apprentice – get us in, T’Shaun!) in our segment “Useful Skills With T’Shaun Barrett”, and he correctly guessed the card Stu picked. Rumors that our Houdini for the evening put small mirrors on the suspiciously placed set of crutches used by Stu for his “foot injury” have been strenuously denied by T’Shaun’s representatives and lawyers.

John can't hide his seething, rivalrous hatred for Stu. Good thing our guests are saner.

We wrapped the episode with one of our (okay, one of Jessie’s) favorite bits, “Strictly Platonic”. This edition of our old chestnut included lovelorn posts from one man with “all sorts of crazy fantasies about being a gay slut” and another who’s offering women to “meet for coffee i could rub your feet their or out in public”. This gentleman is particularly generous – “YES IT FREE” he writes.

Go ahead and watch this show. YES IT FREE. www.thestream.tv

Quick: who’s Clicker.com’s best of 2009 in the live TV category? We’ll give you a hint – us! Damn, we accidentally gave it away.

More links: past shows, Feedburner, Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, LiveFromTheFuture.com, IMDB

Wrap: Taryn Southern and Jonathan London

We nerded it up with web TV stars Taryn Southern of “Wrong Hole” fame and Geekscape’s Jonathan London.

Watch this show and make Taryn even happier. www.thestream.tv

For this show, we welcomed two stars from the internet world (like us! Bwahahahaaaa). First, of course, we had to get in our usual round of Florida-bashing with an appearance by the one and thankfully only Stan Vereen, North Florida’s #1 Above-Ground Pool Salesman. Stan made another concentrated effort to burst through his monthly sales quota, and quite nearly half-succeeded in hawking a few kiddie pools to some of our chat room audience.

Watch out: Jonathan "Python" London - will bring you into a world of hurt - with his personality!

In a rare moment of fair play following this, Stu gave voice to a letter from a disgruntled fan from his least favorite state. Our new friend Mr. Anonymous vented by saying that Stu’s regular Florida criticisms were… by and large correct. But, he warned, he was still annoyed and would take appropriate measures should the diatribes continue. Hmmm. Perhaps we could placate you with a nice above-ground pool at cost, sir? We’d even throw in a floating air mattress and a live bootleg of John Fulton and The Fresh at no extra charge.

Guest #1 skipped on the kiddie pools, but thankfully consented to hang out in the chair and be interviewed. Taryn is an accomplished young actress/writer/director  fully active in the web sphere, conceiving and starring in the video of her heart-rending power ballad about anal sex, “The Wrong Hole”, among other activities.

Taryn Southern - a guest who followed the rules - she brought cupcakes!

Proof that you can bribe writers and publicists with "Sprinkles" cupcakes.

Unfortunately, these activities do occasionally lead to Taryn falling victim to scams; she told us a story about getting ripped off by “moonlighting car repair” guys offering her a discount to “fix” her car’s dents; not surprisingly, they took her money and left the car in worse shape than before.

Taryn, reacting to the ice-cold comedy stylings of Paap.

Since Taryn wrote and conceived a show based around international travel, we felt it appropriate to subject her to our quiz on the subject, “Travel Freak”. She had to name which international city was described in each question. Out of the five queires, however, she only succeeded in nailing one – which American “party” destination had to pass a law banning the molestation of trash cans? You read that right – molesting trash cans. The answer could only be a city in Florida, in this case Daytona Beach.

See?! She DID have fun on the show.

Taryn closed her segment with a little sage and useful advice – how to make a web video for under $5. And her method? We won’t get into the details here; let’s just say it’s very effective and involves frosting, cake mix and red food coloring.

Next up was Jonathan, who was kind enough to bring Stu a genuine get-well card. Our Fearless Host, it turns out, snapped a foot bone or several while “auditioning for a part” – although witnesses swear that he was actually dancing drunk, naked and high on half a case of Robitussin cough syrup outside a Van Nuys liquor store when the incident occurred. The card had a cute picture of a kitten on it, which is perhaps what lured official LFTF dog mascot Bucky to the host’s desk to inspect the proceedings while we were on-air.

Every February 9th, these three "Friends" rejects reunite to commemorate the show we could've been on. Oh well, off to Denny's.

Thanks to Erin A. Darling for filling in for Schneiderpants!

We know you’re at work. You’re not supposed to be here anyway, so you might as well shirk some more by watching this show. www.thestream.tv

Clicker.com says we’re the best of 2009 in the live TV category. We didn’t even bribe them or anything.

More links: past shows, Feedburner, Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, LiveFromTheFuture.com, IMDB

Wrap: Jon Foster, Nicolas Wright and Claudia Lonow from Accidentally on Purpose

Life is like a sitcom… at least it was on our latest episode, when we welcomed three very humorous guests from the CBS show Accidentally On Purpose – actors Jon Foster and Nic Wright, and creator/producer/writer Claudia Lonow.

If you watch this show, you’ll be as happy and entertained as these guys. We swear. www.thestream.tv

Quick, what do you get when you mix two funny actors and an ex-actress and current producer/writer with lots of good war stories from her years in Hollywood? Uh, well, the latest episode of our show, that’s what.

Would you sell any of these people an above-ground pool? We didn't - but we would!

Stu, slipping a little too easily into his new persona of Tallahassee’s #1 above-ground pool salesman Stan Vereen, made a valiant attempt to sell our musical director John Fulron a Diamond Star 52″ with “little or no” money down.

Stan Vereen, Tallahasse's #1 above-ground pool salesman gets dressed for work... as a douche bag. *belt courtesy of 2006.

John Fulton got the news he was hoping for from the clinic. Disease free - for 24 more hours!

On camera, John turned down the offer, but his surreptitious passing of several large-denomination bills Stu’s way after the show suggests he might have subsequently changed his mind. Pool-less Jessie, meanwhile, was re-christened Tits Johnson for no good reason at all by Stan/Stu.

Claudia Lonow, creator of "Accidentally on Purpose" shares all - and we mean ALL her secrets. Just go to 22:00 minutes in to the show and you'll get it.

We have a sneaking suspicion that Claudia lacks easy access to a nice vinyl-lined backyard swimming facility or has ever spent quality time in Tallahassee. Despite these glaring character flaws, we were open-minded enough to welcome her as our first guest of the night. She talked about the genesis of Accidentally On Purpose, and its very long journey from book adaptation to story pitch to TV series.  She also talked about her early years as an actress in Hollywood, when she played a role in the night-time soap Knots Landing, and at one point even made an appearance on The Tonight Show… tripping to the ground on her way to the guest chairs.

Once again, Stu tries his "I had a cameo on Dallas" pickup line on a guest. Once again, it fails.

In her actress days, Claudia also dated actors from CHiPS and Little House on the Prairie. Which was enough reason for us to grill her in the quiz segment of her appearance, “Bad Boyz“. Non-sympathetic characters from TV of that era were named and described, and she had to guess which show they appeared in. Facing slightly less pressure than she probably did after that stumble on The Tonight Show, Claudia nailed three out of the four questions (okay, there was a gimme – one Bad Boy was the man her character was married to on Knots Landing). Not content with grilling her about characters on 30-year old TV shows, we also put Claudia through our (not exactly) patented “59-Second Gauntlet“. She didn’t quite get all the questions, but managed to spill some very revealing tidbits about her past. We won’t get into it here, let’s just say we’re definitely buying this woman’s memoirs once they’re published.

Bucky, our newest P.A. is already sleeping on the job while Stu downloads a "make it funny" app for the show.

Given Claudia’s sterling performance in her quiz, we thought her colleagues Jon and Nic would nail the questionnaires we set up for them. BZZZT, wrong! With a strong handicap in favor of Canadian Nic, we pitted the two actors against each other in our contest “French Rock Band or Montreal Sex Shop?” But it was Jon who pulled off the major upset, taking the victory, or as they say in Quebec and in certain strange neighborhoods in Tallahassee, La Victoire.

Nic Wright with the "spoils" of his win on the show - pure, uncut Quebec Maple Syrup. *Made in Mexico. Jon Foster considers where he left his pomade. Oh yeah, Stu stole it.

Despite his painful loss, Nic didn’t slide into dejection, bitterness and eventual painkiller addiction. Instead he and Jon regaled Stan – I mean, Stu – with a tasty anecdote regarding Nic losing his twelve-gauge shotgun virginity (and nearly his shoulder) at an L.A. gun range with Jon. This activity was probably a little less challenging than Jon’s old pastime of noodling. For those many of you unfamiliar with noodling, it has something to do with looking for a good time in Iowa, catfish punching, river wading, and several days of fish leftovers for lunch.

Jon Foster quickly became our favorite person in the world by endorsing our show. Turns out, he was just covering a mustard stain. Great hair though.

We quizzed the boys a little more, raising the stakes substantially in our next test, “Ca-Nuck Buddy“, with a bottle of what Stu claimed was genuine 100% Canadian maple syrup. With much to play for, Nic took this one, guessing the identity of enough Canadian celebrities from a series of clues to claim the prize.

Finally, we ran our gentlemen guests through the “59 Second Gauntlet”. Despite enjoying a huge competitive advantage given that they had heard the very same questions only minutes earlier, Jon and Nic couldn’t quite make it to the end. Which was tragic, however at least Nic has that nice bottle of maple syrup to comfort and console him.

Are you suffering from anxiety and depression? So are we, but we're hiding our pain. That's ACTING!

Jon and Nic, by the way, have their own online talk show, and it’s remarkably free of Florida pool salesmen, pancake condiments or Canadian sex toys. Lunch with Nic and Jon comes to you every week or so on the AoP web site. And don’t forget to feast your eyes on Accidentally on Purpose itself, currently airing Monday nights at 8:30 on CBS.

We know you’re at work. You’re not supposed to be here anyway, so you might as well shirk some more by watching this show. www.thestream.tv

Clicker.com says we’re the best of 2009 in the live TV category. We didn’t even bribe them or anything.

More links: past shows, Feedburner, Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, LiveFromTheFuture.com, IMDB

Thanks to our sponsor DrinkEvo.com!

Wrap: Comic Steve Byrne

We funnied it up with witty and offensively handsome comedian Steve Byrne and a special guest!

Watch this show, it’s good for you. www.thestream.tv

This was our last show of the year (awwwww) and we did it with two out of three regulars (Jessie was out “sick”; ugly rumors had her nursing a violent and durable post-birthday hangover). The very capable and not at all hung over Martini Beerman did IM duties for the night, and has so far escaped with only minimal psychological damage.

Well, if your surname is "Beerman", you pretty much have to live the part. Martini models her beverage of choice.

With our crew thus assembled, we launched right into the comedy. Because that’s what we likes to do and it sure beats slinging burgers for a living. Stu got things started by possibly offending yet another state in our great Union, trotting out his impersonation of “Jersey Guy”. We also might have ticked off a few cars by showing controversial pictures from John and Stu’s visit to the LA Auto Show in our first bit, “Car Show, Yo“. Okay, maybe not controversial, unless you’re offended by Our Host’s white gangsta posing in front of various bland automobiles. Really, Stu, you should act more appropriately around generic, mass-produced vehicles.

Once we were done with the cars, it was time for the guests. The main Occupier of Guest Chair was comedian Steve Byrne, fast ascending the various Mounts Olympus of the comedy world (The Tonight Show, an HBO special, USO tours, etc.). Steve is of mixed Korean and Irish DNA, and Stu asked if his upbringing or ancestry had anything to do with his choice of joke telling as a profession. No, actually it was because working as a grunt at a comedy club was the only job he could get in New York back in his lean days. How’s that for destiny?

One of these two guys is actively entertaining the audience. Can you guess which? (hint: it's probably not Stu)

We then launched into the really deep, philosophical questions, from both Stu and the chat room, like “do you ever get mistaken for Jon of Jon & Kate Plus 8?“ (answer: no, because Steve’s in decent shape and actually has talent). The interview built to a rousing crescendo with the nail-biting game show segment of the evening, “Korean Or Irish Proverb”? The studio audience could barely keep to their seats as Steve desperately groped for answers (actually, maybe that was because of all the energy drink they overdosed on). Amazingly, such dissimilar cultures as Korea and Ireland seem to produce the same variety of homespun wisdom about cattle carts and hungry mice, so Steve barely eked out a win, answering a bare minimum of the queries correctly.

We had another burning question for him, being the smart and good looking entertainer he is. How, oh how, would he ask our fetchingly attractive producer LV out on a date? Looking into the camera, he deadpanned “show me some respect”. Aha, now that’s how showbiz types get the ladies. Boys, are you taking notes?

Stu finally figures out the difference between Korea and Ireland, while Steve acts convincingly impressed.

Steve was only getting warmed up. He was so overjoyed at his victory in the proverb quiz, he started dry-humping the host desk. Never let it be said that we don’t make an effort to please our guests. Or our studio props, come to think of it.

We still have it in us to entertain the old fashioned way, though, and to prove it we brought out our special guest, actress Danielle Bisutti. The very tuneful Danielle sang a few numbers with John, closing the show with a nice hit or two of music.

John shows us a little leg. And he's not even drunk yet! Don't feed him any beer, whatever you do.

The two harmonizers also closed out our 2009. It was a hell of a year, and we’re glad even the host desk got some action out of it. Who knows which props will be propositioned in 2010; tune in to find out. We’re back in mid-January, so enjoy your holidays and New Year while we’re getting our R&R. And good luck hitting on that furniture.

The internet is evil and a waste of time! Except for our show’s home at www.thestream.tv

Other links n’ stuff: past shows, Feedburner,  Twitter, iTunes, Zune, Facebook, LiveFromTheFuture.com

Wrap: Musetta Vander and the Hillenbrand brothers from Transylmania!

We give thanks for vampires, 800 year old Romanian castles and our guests, actress Musetta Vander and directors Scott and David Hillenbrand of the upcoming horror comedy feature, Transylmania.

See this episode – in color! – at www.theStream.tv

As anyone in Los Angeles will tell you, Halloween in this city stretches pretty far past October 31. For us, it’s lasted well into Thanksgiving, as we hosted a troika of guests from the soon-to-be-released vampire spoof, Transylmania - in theaters December 4th, 2009.

We did kowtow a little to the current holiday. We effected this in true, grand LIVE! From the Future… style with Stu venting about the worst Thanksgiving side dishes ever. His candidates? Yams with those ugly little wet marshmallows.

Andrea Ball (andreaball.com) gets ready to take some live Instant Messages in her "Beat It" edition jacket. Smooth, criminal baby!

Our IM Girl for the evening, the lovely and vivacious Andrea Ball (substituting for Jessie Schneiderman), volunteered green beans as her least favorite side dish, and LFTF’s musical director, John Fulton, piped up that he hated cranberry sauce. Communist! At least that’s what I think he said; honestly, nobody pays him any attention when he’s not playing music.

John Fulton, the new spokesman for "Midnight Von Douche"

Jared "I brought the tripods and legal releases" Greenhouse shows us his one-handed technique.

Subsequent to this discussion, we welcomed Musetta Vander, one of the stars of Transylmania, who plays vampire hunter Teodora van Sloan (which, coincidentally, is also the name of John Fulton’s transvestite lounge singer alter ego).

Actress Musetta Vander, aka "Teodora Van Sloan" from the new comedy feature "Transylmania" talks about Zip Lining from a castle, training with knives and the countless ways she could punish Stu.

Cheerful Musetta talked about her experiences on the (freezing cold Romanian) set of Transylmania, which included delivering her lines in an Eastern European accent (hot!), taking sword fighting lessons for a month (er, not that kind of sword fighting), and training in martial arts.

Musetta Vander sharpens her fingers as she prepares to stab Stu in the neck - vampire-style.

Then it was time for Musetta to play: “Ikea or Romanian Town?” Thanks to our little quiz, Musetta is now well acquainted with the best cheap pillowcases the Swedes have to offer, and the countless Romanian towns that no one can pronounce. Who says you don’t learn anything on our show?

John tries to convince Andrea that some women actually like his sweater.

Next up were Musetta’s former bosses, Scott and David Hillenbrand, the directors of Transylmania. Scott and David have tag-teamed for over half a dozen movies, including National Lampoon Presents: Dorm Daze, and their collaboration reaches back far in the past – they’ve been making films together since childhood.

Scott and David Hillenbrand listen unenthusiastically to Stu's movie pitches, inlcuding: "Octopus Outfielder: the life and times of Duke McNutts", "Tardball", the unofficial sequel to Dodgeball and "Earnest goes to Hometown Buffet", the proposed 15th installment of the beloved "Earnest goes to..." series.

We tested just how strong those bonds really are by putting the brothers through our notorious “59 Second Gauntlet” (formerly the “60 Second Gauntlet”, now shaved for budgetary reasons). Scott fired off a few quick and theoretically correct answers, but David struggled to come up with a meaningful comeback or two – one stumper was, “Biggest jerk in high school?” Might I propose example “A” below?

John Fulton was a bouncer at LL Bean.

Wow, all that questioning and zip lining and Ikea catalog itemizing really made us hungry. We’re gonna feast for a few days, then we’ll see you at the usual time next Tuesday for a fresh new show. Until then, happy Thanksgiving from all of us LFTFers. Pass the yams and marshmallows, will ya?

See this show now at www.theStream.tv

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WRAP: Danielle Bisutti from True Jackson, VP

Stu tries to host a clean show (PG-13 at best) with Danielle Bisutti of Nickelodeon’s True Jackson, VP.

Maybe it is easy being green. See this episode at www.theStream.tv

It’s not often that Live! From the Future… hosts a guest who appears in a kid-friendly TV show. Danielle Bisutti, one of the stars of Nickelodeon’s teen fashion sitcom True Jackson, VP, stopped by for a little good clean (mostly clean) fun.

Danielle explains exactly how she’s gonna grab this show.

Stu and John made subtle yet oily suggestive comments about Jessie’s wet hair, acquired from a quick shower after a late encounter at Bar Method.

Jessie shows her patented hair tousling technique. Chat roomers passed out in short order.

Our Host somehow got over the heavy breathing long enough to interview the lovely, kelly green-clad Danielle. We talked about her show, now striding along in its second season – thank you very much – and the production thereof.

Stu and Danielle Bisutti having good clean fun sharing filthy stories. I’M KIDDING! – (it wasn’t fun).

Danielle was born into the business; this self professed “theater geek” had very early memories of live TV, sitting in the studio audience for a taping of Mork and Mindy (Nanu Nanu!) She also loves the Godfather, which was good because, from now on, we bring everyone on by kissing Stu’s ring. See examples A and B.

Danielle “Corleone’s” her way on to the show. R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

Danielle’s been acting professionally for a while, appearing on Two and a Half Men, Dharma and Greg and Without a Trace. On True Jackson, VP, she plays Amanda, a viperish corporate type forever trying to foil the heroine of the title. Our chatties were curious about Danielle’s experience in this and other shows, and saved us from descending further into R-rated murk with good questions about her career. One of the most pertinent ones was, “Will Amanda ever bust out in song?”

Song lovers rejoice – Danielle had some serious pipes.

Danielle is a fine singer. She accompanied John on a new song: “At Least You’re Home By 8:30″ and ”Check It.”

Danielle’s also pretty good at answering quizzes. On the infamous Ikea or Social Networking Site?, our guest nailed most of the 10 questions to take home the magnificent prize (i.e. gratitude for enduring the bit).

Danielle ponders: “Is ‘Nujij’ an Ikea Product or a Social Networking Site?”

Then Danielle also nearly made it through all queries in our one-minute, think-fast Gauntlet, managing to keep her porn star name a secret (inappropriate!) but revealing that she’d rather date Sinatra than Elvis (even if he was the young, skinny Elvis? Really, Danielle?)

John shows his true feeling about LV. Scandal!

Johnny Fulron broadcasts only #1 hits.

Stu and Danielle brought the interview to a close by giving away gifts of intrinsic emotional value such as a book by Stu’s friend and a DVD. On the subject of intrinsic emotional value, Stu also screened a sneak preview of his relentlessly flogged web series,  Hurtling Through Space At An Alarming Rate.

Check out a new episode every Monday on Babelgum.com/htsaaar

Clearly, one of these kids knows which camera is on.

After the sneak, Danielle joined John for a special duet of The Fresh’s classic, “Two Buck Chuck”. But again, this was meant to be clean entertainment, so the duo modified the lyrics to sing about the benefits of cheap wine at family Thanksgivings. With that, we managed to once again escape the sharp eye of the Motion Picture Association of America and score only a mild R rating (or PG-13 if you’re optimistic) for this episode.

Will we succeed in doing so next week? Doubtful – our guests include several vampires. Tune in next week for more… we probably won’t be very PG-13 in that one.

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WRAP: Mitch Fatel and Gary Cannon!

Tuesday, November 10 2009 – we were drenched in comedy and biological fluids with standups Mitch Fatel and Gary Cannon.

Feast your eyes – and other organs – on this episode at www.theStream.tv

This episode’s recurring theme was comedy comedy COMEDY, as we hosted the dangerous twin-barreled standup tandem of Mitch Fatel and Gary Cannon.

(Had we been drinking, someone would have gotten seriously hurt)

Before our esteemed guests took their chairs, we read a letter from one viewer in Florida, who asked why, oh why, does Stu find it necessary to mock and insult that great state’s capitol city, Tallahassee? Nothing personal, Anonymous Letter Writer, Stu just hates the place with an unreasonable and bitter passion.

John and Jessie warm up their pipes… and their vocal chords.

On a more positive note, the second episode of the Stu-starring web series Hurtling Through Space At An Alarming Rate has debuted, and our Host tried to prove it by showing a clip from the webisode. Which would have been a lot of fun, except the clip got truncated at about the 1.3 second mark.

Check out a new episode every Monday on Babelgum.com/htsaaar) (*Note: Stu wrote the November 16th episode – The Planet of eventually exploding timebombs of calamitous proportions)

Back here in sunny, gulag-free Los Angeles, Mitch arrived with a whole bunch of swag, namely DVDs and CDs of his appearances.

Mitch signing the DVD’s and CD’s for the guy who won: 4 guys named Stuart; uncanny!

He also arrived with a special lodging request – permission to fall asleep on Jessie’s lady business.

Mitch, proving that this “genital-sleeping clause” is actually in Mitch’s contract.

Mitch, demonstrating his sleeping technique on Gary Cannon’s “hand-gina”

Payoff: Mitch, finally making good on his end of the bargain to sleep where babies are made. Jessie, happily obliges. Team player, Jessie!

In addition to helping Mitch satisfy the Jessie request, we also extracted a few juicy road stories from the ever-touring comedians, such as the time Mitch heroically accepted a sloppy seconds BEEJ in a San Jose green room.

Mitch explains exactly how the accommodating young San Jose resident replaced her tongue ring after personally thanking both Gary and Mitch for a good show. Ah, the road.

John Fulton was on fire this night, playing so fast, he literally became a blur.

John Fulton played in the band “Blur” in the 90’s.

Gary, Mitch, Stu and the multi-talented Jared Greenhouse discuss the gay porn they will shoot – “Blazing Saddle Rash”

Producer Lauren “LV” Valdez takes a moment to reflect on life; courtesy of Newsweek and Maxim.

A rare behind the scenes look at the studio – that’s Brian Gramo’s hat in the bottom left, Producer LV, Stu and Jared Greenhouse. Great times!

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Next Tuesday, November 17th: Filmmaker Ryan Combs!

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TONIGHT: Director Ti West “The House of the Devil” and “Paranormal Activity’s” Ashley Palmer!

So it’s the bloody time of the year again, the season to dust off the old VHS copy of Halloween and buy lots of candy corn so the evil kids in the neighborhood don’t toilet paper your house. Likewise for us at Live! From the Future… the upcoming spook holiday means one thing – horror horror HORROR and plenty of it. For our guest is (cue minor-chord Gothic pipe organ) a rising star of everyone’s favorite blood-stained genre, film director Ti West.

Ti’s most recent effort is the upcoming The House of the Devil, a 1980s-style (and set) slasher pic that has been receiving positive notices from the horror cognoscenti as an intelligent, well-paced shocker. Not yet 30 years old, Ti already has several film credits as a director, and is currently busy with his next project, The Haunting in Georgia.

Also, Ashley Palmer from Paramount Studios’ hit movie: Paranormal Activity. Asheley began her acting career at age five when she played the title role in a community production of Chicken Little. Since then, she has received a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Acting/Musical Theatre and has captured the attention of audiences on the New York stage, film festivals, and primetime television shows on FOX, HBO, E! and the Style Network.

Rumors that Stu and Jessie will appear in costume with graphically realistic oozing wounds appear at the moment to be unfounded. But you never know, strange things happen on Halloween – we might even be funny! Heh heh. Just a joke Stu, please don’t fire us.

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